From my heartache alone anger beliefs body books change choices Comfort creativity doctor family fear friends giveaway gratitude Grief growth guilt healing health heartbreak help home hope life Loss love my children numb nurses other people's stories Our son overwhelm resources Ripples sadness Shock sister support tears telling the story telling the truth time trust
Monthly Archives: September 2010
I was gifted yesterday with so many things – intense fear and the ability to remember to open my heart to love in the midst of it, overwhelming grief and the knowledge that this is exactly the path I need … Continue reading
I haven’t looked at Ben’s pictures in about a month. In preparation for tomorrow, the two month anniversary of his death, I made a copy of one of them. Here it is. Here he is. My son.
Tonight I choose to remember that grief happens because we love deeply, and love is always worth whatever travels in its path. ***** I am working with a chiropractor who uses applied kinesiology. I first saw him the day I … Continue reading
Hey grief. I haven’t had much time for you today and you’ve been pissed, I can tell, so I thought a conversation might do us good. I’m not angry, I’m simply present and you already know that ignoring me doesn’t … Continue reading
Sitting on the floor, hugging a pillow, crying. So much to say. Nothing to say. This just is.
Struggling with epic exhaustion and frustration tonight, I stepped away from convincing my very dirty, strong willed 3 year old that a bath was a good idea and wandered to the book shelf in search of direction. Heading toward Conversations … Continue reading
I am sensing a subtle shift in the way the world works, and the way I exist within it. I could use the word manifesting. I’ve probably overused the word as though uttering it would speed the process. Now that … Continue reading
Today I go to bed grateful for… the beautiful bright light who chose me to be her mama – her smiles, her hugs, the sound of her laughter, her growth, the way her brain works, her love the kindness of … Continue reading
Today was my first full 24 hours on my own with Ada since Ben died. I am exhausted and heartbroken. The day went well, all things considered. I was a little less patient than I would have liked, my pizza … Continue reading